All Those Denominations
To be honest, one of the most serious problems of Protestantism has been its tendency to split into factions. Douglas Woodruff, for example, tells of ‘an industrious German, the father of a large family, who, with the help of willing child labour compiled a dictionary of Protestant sects. His name is Grundler, and he has often kept his children in on a Sunday to help him arrange the cards, listing 2,639 different Christian denominations, the glorious fruit of the Protestant Reformation.’
And I read somewhere of a story that comedian Emo Philips used to tell:-
In conversation with a person I had recently met, I asked, “Are you Protestant or Catholic?”
My new acquaintance replied, “Protestant.”
I said, “Me too! What denomination?”
He answered, “Baptist.”
“Me too!” I said. “Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?”
“Northern Baptist,” he replied.
“Me too!” I shouted.
We continued to go back and forth. Finally I asked, “Northern conservative fundamentalist Baptist, Great Lakes Region, Council of 1879 or Northern conservative fundamentalist Baptist, Great Lakes Region, Council of 1912?”
He replied, “Northern conservative fundamentalist Baptist, Great Lakes Region, Council of 1912.”
I said, “Die, heretic!”‘