‘A better story’ – 16
Let’s begin by acknowledging that the better story that Christians tell will not be welcomed in public square. No matter how sensitively well tell our story, many will be offended by it. But we cannot remain silent.
Our story begins with the hall-marks of the sexual revolution: radical individualism, a redemptive trajectory and a moral vision. Our story must connect with these distinctives. We need to show how the individual thrives when we safeguard the many, and how our narrative engages with concerns about equality, justice and freedom from oppression.
We must confess that we have allowed a sub-Christian view of sex to dominate our thinking. Our moral convictions were used to condemn, not to serve. The sexual revolution is a wake-up call from our complacency.
But the sexual revolution has failed as well. People’s sex lives are as confused as they have ever been. The retreat from marriage has heaped misery on the most vulnerable, especially children. The pornographication and sexualisation of children is a tragedy unfolding before our very eyes. Confusion of self-identity has left a frightening hole at the centre of what it means to be human. No-one seems to know what the end-game will be.
As Christians, we discover that our identity is something given to us by God. We flourish when we live in harmony with who we really are.
It will take some hard choices to lead to something that is worthwhile and lasting. Since we believe that God loves us passionately and faithfully, human love must follow the same model. Sexual intimacy needs the faithful commitment of a marriage bond between one man and one woman. This will then help build stronger families and communities, and help protect the young and the vulnerable. These ideals can be hard for the unmarried, or those struggling in unhappy marriages. But this link between sex and marriage provides the best chance of flourishing for us all.
We cannot impose our vision on others. But we invite all to join this adventure and prove it for themselves.
We have to believe our story. We can’t sit on the fence for ever. We can’t remain silent.
But why make a fuss about it? Why not just accept that people have different world-views and different life-styles? Can’t we just accept sexual diversity? Not really. Sex is not a minor player in God’s economy. He views immoral behaviour as incompatible with his kingdom (1 Corinthians 6:9). So figuring out what constitutes moral behaviour is not trivial. We can’t pick and choose from God’s agenda for sex. It’s all of a piece. Don’t accept the common criticism that Christians are obsessed with sex. Its misuse can do immeasurable harm. Men and woman will march bravely through dangerous streets for their right to think and live as they please. And a thousand emotional scars borne by children testify to the destructive power of sex.
We have to live our story, in order to bring about change. We must fire the imagination. We must re-think how we view our bodies:-
See how a single person honours God with his chasteness. Observe a young couple walking hand in hand, and ask, Where is this pointing?
We must embody what we believe. We need to turn our beliefs into actions, and our actions into habits, and our habits into lifestyles. Learn a lesson from the sexual revolution:-
Orthodox Christians must do the same, because that it what the gospel demands. We need to re-imagine and re-affirm the value of the single life. We need to realise that few minority cultures survive if they leave the romantic interests of their young people to chance. Let our weddings not ape secular middle-class ceremonies, but rather bear witness to the God-given glory of it all: ‘a man, forsaking all others to love his wife, bringing his gifts and skills to building a home and caring for children; a woman, equally, bearing the image of God, committing to a lifelong union that will serve and bless the whole community as well.’ How about making marriage preparation one of the most important pastoral skills for those preparing for ministry? On top of this, ‘careful thought will be required for how children are helped to recognize and respect the diversity of views they may encounter at school, while remaining secure and confident in their own Christian identity.’
For the pastor, all this doesn’t require a sledge-hammer, but rather a tool-box for changes, some of which can happen right now.
Harrison, Glynn. A Better Story: God, Sex And Human Flourishing. IVP. Kindle Edition. Chapter 16.